Sianz..
Long time no blog..
Some interesting things happened in the last 2 weeks. During the pe lessons, we played frisbee and competed among ourselves. Something interesting happened! I tried to intercept PeiXiong catch by cutting in his direction. He pushed me from behind and in the end, my back was on his head. LOL!! I slided down his head. LOL!! I just only got one sentence to describe this: REVENGE WAS SO SWEET! Haha..
Another happy thing that happened was that I got a good student notice for returning a handphone to the General Office after I found it. I didn't expect things to turn out this way but I felt happy anyway. Well, maybe that's a turn of luck for me.
Last good thing was that I had been arguing with my math teacher regarding a math common test answer. I felt what I did was right so I argued with her from monday till wednesday. I gave up then she called me on friday to tell me that my method was acceptable! I finally had reached the target that I was supposed to get for all my math tests. I was quite happy about it. At least I know that my thinking was not wrong.
Weekends to me is a waste of my time. I have been wasting all my weekends sleeping away. Sleeping 18hours on Saturday and Sunday! Haiz.. WHAT AM I DOING!? Really quite afraid of what will happen in 4weeks time. Anyway I'm the last in my class to finish my A level exam. SIANZ..
A lot of bad things happened in a row. 1st was that my dad is going to have another paycut. This is the 3rd time within 2 years. WT.. All thanks to the NEW JAP BOSS. Sianz.. Going into the lower-income group. Not going to have any money to go out with friends and have to work! I hope that A levels faster finish then I can work to support myself. Don't want my parents to feel unhappy other money issues. Another thing was that I had sustained quite a number of injuries over the past few weeks. 1st was my back then now it was my arm and left leg. Sianz.. I can't punch and kick the punching bag anymore when I'm angry. Haiz.. Have to keep the anger inside until I'm fit to wear that glove again! SIANZzz..
Something emotional at the bottom. It's not meant to target anyone..
I have been pondering about things over and over again. I don't know why I feel so stiff up inside. One of the things that I have thought of was about friendship. I really don't know what I'm starting to lose trust in people I called friends. I don't feel like hanging out with them. I remembered one person said before:"It's better to be alone than in a group." Another friend of mine said this "When u have less friends, you have less chances of being backstabbed by them." Well, I guessed what they said made some sense to me. I know what's the feeling of being betrayed. The scar is still there. I will never forget what happen.
I don't know how to put it. I feel that the friendship I have in class is very different from the friendship I had during DE camp. The friends I made at DE give me a feeling that they are not there to use me. They give me a feeling that my presence was valued and needed. I just looked through the card that the DE SIs gave me. There were a total of 33 wishes inside. Everything seems so sincere and I was so touched by their comments. I felt so bonded to them until I still missed how all of us had fun in the camp despite so many sleepless nights and physical training. But in class or at home, I feel that whether there is me or not, it doesn't make a difference to anything. I'm just there to fill up the places. I felt that I was used and things were not the way they were anymore. That's how I feel when I go class even in secondary school. Haiz.. I told my mum a lot of times that I wanted to transfer school. I think I just need a change of environment. Maybe I can find a place where I feel that I'm worth living for..
Some interesting things happened in the last 2 weeks. During the pe lessons, we played frisbee and competed among ourselves. Something interesting happened! I tried to intercept PeiXiong catch by cutting in his direction. He pushed me from behind and in the end, my back was on his head. LOL!! I slided down his head. LOL!! I just only got one sentence to describe this: REVENGE WAS SO SWEET! Haha..
Another happy thing that happened was that I got a good student notice for returning a handphone to the General Office after I found it. I didn't expect things to turn out this way but I felt happy anyway. Well, maybe that's a turn of luck for me.
Last good thing was that I had been arguing with my math teacher regarding a math common test answer. I felt what I did was right so I argued with her from monday till wednesday. I gave up then she called me on friday to tell me that my method was acceptable! I finally had reached the target that I was supposed to get for all my math tests. I was quite happy about it. At least I know that my thinking was not wrong.
Weekends to me is a waste of my time. I have been wasting all my weekends sleeping away. Sleeping 18hours on Saturday and Sunday! Haiz.. WHAT AM I DOING!? Really quite afraid of what will happen in 4weeks time. Anyway I'm the last in my class to finish my A level exam. SIANZ..
A lot of bad things happened in a row. 1st was that my dad is going to have another paycut. This is the 3rd time within 2 years. WT.. All thanks to the NEW JAP BOSS. Sianz.. Going into the lower-income group. Not going to have any money to go out with friends and have to work! I hope that A levels faster finish then I can work to support myself. Don't want my parents to feel unhappy other money issues. Another thing was that I had sustained quite a number of injuries over the past few weeks. 1st was my back then now it was my arm and left leg. Sianz.. I can't punch and kick the punching bag anymore when I'm angry. Haiz.. Have to keep the anger inside until I'm fit to wear that glove again! SIANZzz..
Something emotional at the bottom. It's not meant to target anyone..
I have been pondering about things over and over again. I don't know why I feel so stiff up inside. One of the things that I have thought of was about friendship. I really don't know what I'm starting to lose trust in people I called friends. I don't feel like hanging out with them. I remembered one person said before:"It's better to be alone than in a group." Another friend of mine said this "When u have less friends, you have less chances of being backstabbed by them." Well, I guessed what they said made some sense to me. I know what's the feeling of being betrayed. The scar is still there. I will never forget what happen.
I don't know how to put it. I feel that the friendship I have in class is very different from the friendship I had during DE camp. The friends I made at DE give me a feeling that they are not there to use me. They give me a feeling that my presence was valued and needed. I just looked through the card that the DE SIs gave me. There were a total of 33 wishes inside. Everything seems so sincere and I was so touched by their comments. I felt so bonded to them until I still missed how all of us had fun in the camp despite so many sleepless nights and physical training. But in class or at home, I feel that whether there is me or not, it doesn't make a difference to anything. I'm just there to fill up the places. I felt that I was used and things were not the way they were anymore. That's how I feel when I go class even in secondary school. Haiz.. I told my mum a lot of times that I wanted to transfer school. I think I just need a change of environment. Maybe I can find a place where I feel that I'm worth living for..